The Biggest Lessons Marriage Has Taught Us In Our First Year

Justin and I have been married just under a year, and like many of you have probably heard too, we’ve been told countless times the first year is the hardest. Though our experience hasn’t necessarily reflected that, the next step in a relationship such as marriage naturally leads to new circumstances and challenges. In today’s post I’m sharing the biggest lessons marriage has taught us in our first year + how we’ve grown individually and as a couple over the last 10 1/2 months.

We’re on the same team.
This is something we always reassure each other of when needed, because as two separate people, it can feel like opposing sides when completing tasks or making decisions sometimes. This is totally natural and happens to all of us, but a simple reminder of “we’re on the same team” helps us refocus with us in mind rather than just him and myself. Something that brought us together in the first place was how close we were and what a great team we were together, and that has rang true throughout our relationship.

As my frequent readers know, the big task Justin and I have been tackling in our first year of marriage is buying our first house. This process has pulled on our heart strings more than you know, and we’re learning how to fine tune our skills of working as one unit. As horrid as house hunting has been, it’s made us even stronger as a couple, comforting each other when we’re hit with another loss and picking up the pieces for each other when we’re feeling defeated.

In addition to the home search, I quit my job and pursued a new one this past fall. This process took longer than I anticipated and I experienced a plethora of stressful and discouraging days, but Justin supported me through it all and I’m so grateful for that. He always reassured me when I felt like there was no end in sight, reminding me it will all work out the way it’s supposed to.

Along with these things, we also had some unexpected health concerns with Justin. This involved lots of trips to the doctor trying to figure out what was wrong and running test after test, which is something we had yet to deal with as a couple until this point. Through it all, we’re on the same team and nothing is more comforting than that, no matter how good or bad the circumstances may be.

Communication is key.
I think arguments and misunderstandings are the first thing that pops into everyone’s heads when they read this statement, but communication encompasses so much more than that. For us, we like to check in on each other throughout the day when we’re not together and decompress when we get home from work by walking each other through how our days went. Being in sync and knowing how the other person is feeling through open communication helps to ensure nothing gets swept under the rug and goes unheard. I like knowing what state of mind he’s in and what’s in his head, and he does the same for me.

Common interests are important.
Justin and I are alike and different in many ways, and we always manage to find things to do or places to go that we both enjoy. Even if it’s as simple as watching a TV show together or going for a walk, having common interests in a hobby or activity we both love helps to bring us together and to further connect. Whether you’ve been together for years or are just starting your journey, it’s important to always continue to find things that you both like to do together as you mature and grow to keep you close. It’s so easy to just do your own thing when unplugging every night when you get home from work, but finding something you can do together, even if it’s just sitting and talking, is really beneficial.

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In conclusion, our first year of marriage has been absolutely beautiful, with new life events that have helped us grow closer and work even harder/better as a team. My love for him grows every day, and I’m so blessed to have him by my side and get to experience all the highs and lows of life with someone I love so dearly. If you’re married, what’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned in marriage? Thanks so much for reading today’s post & check back for a new one on Friday!

P.S. I still drool over our wedding photos every single time I see them (shot by the talented Arianna Torres). For more, check out the blog post on our wedding!