House Hunting Update #8: What Nobody Tells You About Buying a House

You can ask people who’ve done it how the house buying process works, but I’ve come to realize that there are some things that nobody tells you. Just when you think you’ve experienced it all, from the highs to the lows, there’s new emotions and circumstances popping up that are unexpected and unique to your first home buying experience. Keep reading for three big things nobody really tells you about buying a house!

Catch up on the rest of the posts in my house hunting series so you know the whole story, from the beginning (starting in February of this year) to present day:

Before we get into this topic, I want to update you that next Friday is our scheduled closing date, and I’ll likely do another update next week that’s more detailed on the finalization process.

Everyone has opinions.

Everybody’s got them, and they’re going to share them. The best way I can explain this is like bringing too many friends or family members along when you buy a prom dress or wedding dress — too much feedback and opinions strengthens the pressure on you and can make you reconsider your gut instincts.

You can’t please everyone with your choices, and that’s not something I really expected. Everybody is going to “dislike” something. I know people are probably thinking they’re coming from a good place when they say these things, but in my experience, it can still feel unsettling.

If you’re anything like me, you’ll probably be hypersensitive to people’s thoughts when it comes to a big purchase like this one. As a first time home buyer, I really value what people have to say, especially by those who’ve done this before. I try to not really take anything to heart, but I must say it’s hard not to sometimes.

Some people are going to say certain updates are worth it, while others will urge you to not spend the money. People will ask what your plans are for different rooms and details of the house, then give their advice on what they’d prefer. You don’t need anyone else to like your decision or your house, and just know that you don’t have to take everyone’s advice either. You’re the one that’s going to be living there, so your own opinion is the only one that matters. With that being said, I can confirm that these sensitivities subside as the process goes on, and you become less and less effected by others statements.

It’s kinda scary.

This may be a “duh” for some of you, but maybe a bit of a realization for the rest. We all see people posting pictures on Facebook standing outside their new home with a sold sign and a caption to match saying, “WE’RE SO EXCITED TO ANNOUNCE WE BOUGHT OUR FIRST HOUSE!” Don’t get me wrong, it’s exciting, but scary too. So many tough decisions were made (as well as heartache over lost homes) to get to that point that you don’t see and can’t fully understand until you do it for yourself. The process isn’t quick, simple and painless as it appears to be on social media.

This is likely the biggest purchase you’ve ever made in your life at this point, and with that comes a lot of very real document signing and money exchanges. Though it’s very joyous to be getting a home, there’s underlining nervousness mixed in due to the high dollar amounts and very serious agreements — and that’s totally natural.

There are so many things running through your mind when you’re making a decision like this, and it’s so easy to think from the outside that it’s all about “decorating” and the other fun stuff. There’s so much more to it than that, which I always knew from the beginning, but you really can’t fully understand until you’re in it yourself. Home buying, not matter what your budget or circumstances are, is a risk and is scary.

There’s so much change.

We have so many changes ahead of us. Justin and I will likely never live in an apartment again, nor on the same street or this neighborhood. We will no longer drive that same route to work or the grocery store, and the places that are so close to us now will no longer be. We spent two years in this apartment, and if I think about it too much, it’s a little sad that we’re leaving.

Even though this apartment is overpriced (thanks to the month-to-month renting uncharge that you can read all about in some of my previous posts), space is limited (our kitchen is literally microscopic) and we’ve had our fair share of issues with the management staff, it’s been our first home. This has been our first place of our own after four years spent in college dorms, it’s finally filled with our own furniture and freedom to do as we have pleased. This is where we lived as we planned our wedding, and the place we came home to after our honeymoon. Our little home wasn’t a lot, but it was ours.

With time comes change, and naturally, that’s something we’re both excited and anxious about. A new neighborhood. New responsibilities. New space. New everything. There will be no maintenance team to call when there’s a problem. We’ll be on our own, making this next big step toward our future, hand in hand.

MY ADVICE

I wanted this post/series to express that so much goes into buying a house, and if I can give you any advice, it would be:

Don’t rush it and feel pressured to buy a house for any outside reasons, whether it be because people your age are doing it, etc. — follow your own path!
Don’t buy a house just because you’re excited to decorate one (I know, but I actually hear this a lot).
Be 100% financially ready (for me personally, that means putting more than 0% down — but you do you).
Learn to be decisive, but picky enough at the same time that you’re not just taking anything you can get.
Become familiar with the current market before diving too deep into it so you know what you’re getting yourself into, whether it’s a good time to buy a house, etc.

Again, as I always say in these posts, thank you so much for your support and kind words throughout this entire house hunting whirlwind of ours. I started this series wanting to document our experience in a way that’s helpful for others, whether it be therapeutic or tip centered, and I hope it’s been that for you. My wish is that this series leaves you feeling less in the dark and reminds you that you’re not the only person who may be struggling. Thank you for being there & you can follow along with more house updates on my Instagram stories, saved under my Home story highlight. Have an amazing weekend!