Blogging Q&A #4: Bad Experiences With Followers and Brands

Hi friends & happy Sunday! I can’t remember the last time I published a blog post on a Sunday, but with how busy I’ve been these past couple months, I’ve had to adjust my posting schedule a bit. With my 4-year blogging anniversary approaching in September, I’ve gotten lots of questions over the years about the ins and outs of blogging and how to do it “right.” Today I’m going to be focusing on any bad experiences I’ve had with blog readers/followers and brands, diving deeper into brand collaboration scams and how to get the guts to start the blog you’ve always wanted to!

Q: How do you know if brand collaboration emails, Instagram comments & DMs are legit?
A: I did a whole blog post on this last year, but this is one of the most popular posts on my blog and something I get messages about very frequently. So many people are researching this and trying to figure out how to differentiate the good from the bad, and I want to further help you guys out as best as I can. It’s not always black and white, but there are some stand-out indicators for faulty inquiries:

• Reputable brands won’t reach out to work with you if you don’t have a business Instagram account and run it as such. I’ve had tons of girls reach out to me with normal Instagram accounts that they post on a few times a month (or maybe they post more frequently, but that is a common theme), that aren’t bloggers or influencers wondering if the brand messages they’ve received are real. They are 100% not. If you’re not a blogger or influencer treating your online profile as a business, they’re just trying to scam you by praying on someone that doesn’t have experience in the industry and may not catch on to their antics.
• A legitimate brand who is interested in working with you with pure intentions will NEVER leave a comment on one of your Instagram photos asking you to DM them. Never, ever. Those are always spam and I recommend deleting the comments and/or ignoring them. Legitimate brand collaborations are usually via email (though not ALL of those are real either, so please be wary of that) and very occasionally started via Instagram DMs first before requesting to continue the conversation via email.
• You should NEVER have to buy into working with them. If they claim they’ll send you a discount code that will cover a portion of your purchase on their website as part of their collaboration requirements, stay far away. They will likely also offer an affiliate code or link to help you “make money back” on the purchases your followers or anyone else you refer makes, but if you have to buy in, don’t do it. They’re dangling this in front of you simply to make a sale and benefit themselves solely, and they’re likely doing this to hundreds of other people too. It’s also very possible that the affiliate code/link is a false promise.

Q: I’ve wanted to start a blog for years, but I’m so scared of what other people will think. How did you work up the courage to start yours?
A: To be completely honest with you, I never cared what people thought of my blog and I still don’t, so I may be unique in that way. I suppose people are afraid of what their Facebook friends and Instagram followers will think when they suddenly start sharing blog posts and saying “link in bio” on their stories and captions, but DON’T BE. Do you! Blogging is a very personal thing and only your own opinion of your actions matters. If you’re doing it for yourself, not to please others and make yourself look interesting/cool online, or get free stuff and brand opportunities, your intentions are great and you shouldn’t let them get to you. However, I’m human and it can be hard when people actually go out of their way to say something negative to me, but I’ll get more into that in an upcoming question.

Q: How do I start working with brands?
A: This happens in different ways and at different times for all of us. Being consistent, posting high-quality content frequently and strategically, tagging brands and local blogger hashtags in your posts, and taking yourself seriously will get you noticed by brands. There isn’t a secret formula for nailing your first brand collaboration, but those are the key things you can do on your end to help draw those in. You can also pitch to brands via email and Instagram DMs, but there is for sure a wrong way and a right way to do it. Do so with pure intentions and not self-serving, and know what’s realistic for you and where you’re at on your journey (for example, don’t reach out to Urban Outfitters if you only have 10 blog posts and have been blogging for only a couple months). I could go into much further detail on this, but I’ll save that for another post if you’d like to see that!

Q: How are you able to post so frequently while working a full-time job?
A: Very strategically and not always as successfully as I’d like to! You really have to utilize any and all “free time” you have throughout the day. Get to work early so you can write/edit before your shift starts, utilize your lunch breaks, write during dinner, stay up late sometimes, etc. It will become easier as you get into the groove of things and blog work comes more naturally to you. It can be tough some weeks, but staying consistent will help you reach your goals! If you have a passion for it, that will help you find time for it, even if sacrifices are necessary.

Q: Have you ever had a bad experience with a reader/follower or brand?
A: I recently had someone DM me without prompting to tell me my Instagram feed is “too curated, too orange,” and some other not so nice stuff to read. 😅 It honestly dampened my mood for a couple of days, but I’m over it now. She may have said it with pure intentions, but it felt negative on my end since she went out of her way to share her opinion on me when I didn’t ask for it or want it. Personally, I don’t think you should hand out constructive criticism to someone who didn’t ask for it, but maybe that’s just me.

The brands I’ve worked with have been great overall, but not everyone is speedy when it comes to replying back you, sending paychecks/deliverables, etc. I did have to harass one brand for not shipping out the prize they promised in time. They ended up making up for it in gift cards to the giveaway winner that were worth FAR more than the prize (I’m very proud of myself for asking for that and managing to pull it off! 🙌🏻), and funny enough, they also happened to be my highest paid collaboration to date — so how well they are known and how respectable they seem doesn’t always mean they’ll execute their end of the bargain correctly.

I talked about this a long time ago, but I had a former friend subtweet about my blog just to be nasty and try to hurt my feelings in a very catty and passive-aggressive way a few years back. Obviously VERY mature for a 20-something-year-old (lol). Overall, I’ve been very lucky to be surrounded by family, friends and people I’ve connected with online who support and respect what I do very kindly. You certainly shouldn’t have to lose people in your life in pursuit of something you love, and if people you know rear their ugly heads about it, you probably don’t want them in your life anyway. We shouldn’t have to need other people’s approval or encouragement, but it’s certainly nice to have it — and people going out of their way to try to tear you down says way more about them and their own demons than it does about you. I think more criticism comes along as your audience grows, so I’ll likely see more and more negativity as time goes on. That’s part of putting yourself out there, which is unfortunate, but natural I suppose.

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That’s all for today’s Q&A! I wanted to answer some of the most FAQs that I get to cover a few bases all in one post and help provide some clarification on things a lot of you are very curious about. Thanks so much for taking time out of your day to visit my blog and read my posts — it means a lot! Enjoy the rest of your weekend! Feel free to check out my other blogging-related posts and Q&As for more tips and insight into the industry.