Comfort zones: they’re something we all knowingly have, but don’t like to acknowledge or talk about. Today I’m opening up a discussion on comfort zones, where mine lies, pushing past insecurities, living a purposeful and passion-filled life, and becoming the best version of ourselves.
Let’s begin by taking a moment to reflect on the person you want to be: what your passions are and what you picture the best and most ideal version of yourself doing. Does this person get up early, make new friends and finish off each night with a workout? I suggest writing down these traits/qualities you envision in a physical journal, the notes on your phone or in a Word document on your computer. What items on this list are you not doing? Why aren’t you doing them?
Internal You vs. External You
Many of us can agree that there’s a version of ourselves that we see in our minds that we don’t fully see in real life — internal you vs. external you. There are often parts of ourselves that we choose to keep private, whether those are dreams, ambitions, passions or interests. We choose what elements of ourselves that we allow others to see and the parts of our personality that we want total strangers to pick up on. Insecurities and the safety of our comfort zone can sometimes prevent us from fully being our true selves to everyone we meet, unapologetically.
When you make internal you and external you mesh together, it’s the most liberating feeling you can imagine. I’ve never been one to fall into peer pressure to try to fit the mold of everyone else (seriously, I’m stubborn and literally NO ONE can make me do anything I don’t want to do), but there have been times that I didn’t put myself out there to start doing something I had an interest in. Within the past few years, I’ve come to appreciate these unique qualities about myself so much more and strive to always let my internal self radiate outward for everyone to see.
Obliterate Your Insecurities and Fears
I’ve found that many of my insecurities stem from perfectionism, meaning I’d rather not do something than do something to a capacity that I think is below my full capability. I need to remind myself that the attempts are apart of the journey, and living with regret is far worse than wishing you could redo something.
For example, video was always something that was really intimidating to me — an insecurity, if you will. I hated watching myself on camera and I was self conscious about the way I looked and how I sounded, more so in my Jr. high and early high school days. This insecurity has diminished more and more over the past year, not only because I’ve made a conscious effort to do so, but I become more and more sure of myself as time goes on. I made a promise to myself a few months back that I would start doing all the things I had always wanted to do, but let uncertainty stand in the way of.
At 13, I never would have guessed that “confident” would be a word I would describe myself as at 23, but it truly is. Though I have plenty of room for improvement in the confidence realm, I’m proud to have come this far. It can be difficult to put yourself out there sometimes, but it’s so important to remember that some of life’s greatest gifts exist outside your comfort zone. You have to make changes to become the person you want to be and sitting at home on the couch twiddling your thumbs isn’t going to give you the life you want.
My biggest fear is to stop what I’m doing, to stop growing and fail, while I’ve found that others are afraid to start. People seem to be one way or the other. I’m always wanting more, and the day I give up on that is a day I never want to see.
Stop Caring About What Other People Think
I can’t say this enough. People are simply that: people. I’m blessed to not care about what other people think of me most of the time, but I’m human and I definitely have my weak moments. My type A personality causes me to put pressure on myself to always be better, and a day without improving or accomplishing something can feel like a day wasted — therefore I (not my peers) tend to be my worst critic, which arguably is just as tough.
Don’t be hard on yourself, because chances are no one sees the flaws that you see. No one cares about your Instagram feed, who you know, how many followers you have or how awkward you think you are. People who don’t like who you are or what you do don’t deserve a place in your lineup. Those who choose to judge you rather than grow with you are meant for the past.
Live Your Passion and Find Your Drive
I wake up with the drive to do better and be better most of my days, and that’s a mindset I’d like to give to everyone and keep constant everyday of my own life. When you step out of your comfort zone and begin experiencing new things, it’s a high that you won’t ever want to come down from — so why not live that lifestyle every single day? If there’s ever been something you’ve wanted to do and have never tried, DO IT. Take risks. Put yourself out there. Go to bed each night excited about the life you’ve created for yourself. Live passionately.
To go along with this topic, here’s a playlist I created to keep you motivated and passionate about life. This also doubles as a great playlist for working from home, driving to work, cleaning or working out. (P.S. I’m laughing at this random assortment of songs!)
If you like this kind of post, you can catch up on my previous “Let’s Talk” posts here. For my fellow bride-to-be’s out there, I also have a new post up today on IndyBride2B.com on how to style wedding tables on a budget!